Random Drivel from your Average Tosser

...with your host, Binty McShae - whether you like it or not!

Thursday, October 19, 2006

Musical Interludes...

Can someone please tell me what the point is of all those television dramas now shoe-horning bands or musicians into their scripts for apparently little or no reason? Because I for one find it at best distracting, other times frankly tedious and nauseating. Okay, I know that comedy shows have a history of this, The Young Ones being a classic example, but that was the kind of bizarre and surreal programme where Dexy's Midnight Runners playing in the bathroom could actually be considered the norm. But The Killers playing the local bar in The O.C.?

Look, before you start, I absolutely do not watch that twattery. I was channel-hopping, okay? The point is, I know that the programme is supposed to be about a load of jumped up little rich shits who could probably hold a 'small party' with music provided by an entire Glastonbury lineup, but having The Killers play a couple of songs whilst the cast look at them dreamily and say nothing to each other just comes across as an exercise in time-wasting. You can't even blame it on the scriptwriters running out of imagination since the small bit of dialogue I did see demonstrated they didn't have any in the first place.

Unfortunately The O.C. and The Killers are not alone in this. The West Wing has once or twice managed to save themselves five minutes or so of actual drama by drafting in a past music legend, although I admit that since the U.S. Prez probably has to attend functions where these things happen the writers do have a degree of legitimacy. But he also takes a leak occasionally and possibly even takes it up the wrong 'un from Condie and her strap-on from time to time, but I don't need to see either of those either. Well, maybe the second one. Just for a laugh.

Add to the list Entourage, who did an entire storyline where one of the guys was desperate for tickets to see U2 and, sure enough, gets hold of them in the last reel. But why did I then have to sit through about 8 minutes (of a programme that only lasts about 25 without ad breaks anyway) of Bono? It's not like I don't appreciate the music but I already have it on CD. And if I wanted to see them live I would buy a fucking ticket myself and soak up the atmosphere. To cap it all Bono does a birthday shout out at the end to the character in question - I wonder how much he got paid for all that, the hoor!

The worst example I ever saw, though, was on that short lived science fiction version of Dawson's Creek (No, I never used to watch that either. Why the fuck are you raising your eyebrows at me?), the Dido-theme-songed Roswell (Okay, I admit to that one. But not religiously or anything!). Future scriptwriters, read on and learn how NOT to wriggle a musical performance into your storyline...

Imagine, if you will... something has gone terribly wrong and our heroes must find some random chick who may have the answers they are looking for. Off they head to some University a couple of hours out of town somewhere on a single-minded mission to locate her. She's not in her dorm? Bugger! Oh well, lets run around the campus frantically, with no real clue to where she may be. But wait, what's that tucked away over there in some random badly-lit corner? Why, it's a stage, with a couple of dozen studenty-folk milling about it looking mildly impressed. And who is that on the stage? Cue one of the heroes piping up... "It's Nelly Furtado!".

I shit you not.

Mission forgotten, for the duration of one song anyway, whilst they stand there dreamily watching old Nel', who (bless her!) is trying her best not to look too stupidly out of place. Of course, right at the end of the song one of the heroes turns and sees in the crowd... the girl they were looking for! Huzzah!

So there you have it. Nelly Furtado is secretly an undercover Alien using her music to assist her brethren here on earth. They don't write 'em like they used to!

Cheers m'dears!

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At Thursday, October 19, 2006 5:46:00 pm, Blogger SaM-GiRL said...

LOL!! you really have a way with with words, you should consider becoming a writer!

At Thursday, October 19, 2006 5:51:00 pm, Blogger SheBah said...

Binty, I have to confess I love all that celeb appearance in tv dramas stuff. I especially love the Simpsons, which is full of celeb cameos, Barry White in Aly McBeal, the many and various celebs in Sex and the City, Extras with celebs taking the piss out of themselves, yeah, bring it on! At least they are all real stars, unlike our TV channels habit of having all their own contracted presenters, weather people et al appearing on all their chat abd reality shows -it feels really incestuous. Jonathan Ross interviews Ricky Gervais, Esther Rantzen comes dancing etc etc. Jeez, fuck that boring shit.

At Thursday, October 19, 2006 5:53:00 pm, Blogger SheBah said...

See what you started, Binty, I didn't even know I had opinions on this stuff!

At Friday, October 20, 2006 2:13:00 am, Blogger FlyingRodent said...

You forgot the Polyphonic Spree appearing in Scrubs and Marilyn Manson appearing in Hollyoaks.

Ok, the second one's a lie, but I'd tune in.

At Friday, October 20, 2006 6:02:00 am, Blogger SafeTinspector said...

"short lived science fiction version of Dawson's Creek"
What? Was it still called Dawson's Creek? I don't remember such an abomination!

At Friday, October 20, 2006 8:06:00 am, Blogger Binty McShae said...

Sam - you're too kind. No, really. I'm not used to it and it kind of creeps me out! ;-)

Shebah - you miss my point very slightly... The Simpsons fits in the same category as The Young Ones, and is therefore cool. Ally McBeal also fits because, well, love it or hate it that show had a warped mentality and Mr White was usually a figment of her and the Biscuit's imagination. And Extras has to have stars, because that is the whole concept of show! And I don't have a problem with celebrity cameos in general, I just think the 'slotting in a band' thing usually looks half arsed and adds little or nothing to a plot.

Rodent - Oh, how I wish the second was true. You had me going for a second!

SafeT - it was called 'Roswell', based on the book series 'Roswell High', apparently. I call it the Sci-Fi Dawson because it was all teen angst and relationships, except some of the teens were aliens. It was also the first taste much of the world had of Dido as one of her songs was the theme tune.

At Sunday, October 22, 2006 12:26:00 am, Blogger Foot Eater said...

The Sopranos featured David Lee Roth (former Van Halen frontman) and Frank Sinatra Jr as sleazy participants in the New Jersey mob poker game, as themselves, which was quite funny. Extras also takes the piss out of people like Bowie.

Don't know why I said all that, I'm not making any kind of worthwhile point.

At Monday, October 23, 2006 5:30:00 am, Blogger ill man said...

I seem to remember The Flaming Lips appearing on Beverly Hills 90210 or some such travesty. Someone posted it up on youtube a while back, but they were playing 'She Don't Use Jelly'.

Anyway, didn't Deicide play on Saved By The Bell?


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