Random Drivel from your Average Tosser

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Thursday, May 24, 2007

Lost in Translation #03


In Sinless City they just love acronyms. You leave your HDB, drive down the PIE (or take the MRT), get cash from the ATM at the DBS or the POSB, use your HP to send an SMS and tell your friends to meet you in the CBD for a G'n'T before heading off to MOS to pick up an SPG*. It's ridiculously baffling, but I think I'm getting to grips with it. At least, I did until today...

Having spoken to my HOD, who wanted to report to the VP about my progress on the MT side of the IP here at [acronym removed so I don't get fired] I went for a coffee at the SAC and ended up chatting with some RBC's**. Mid-tedium one of my colleagues suddenly jumped up and announced that she had to rush because the P was expecting her. "That's a rather unusual way of excusing yourself to go to the bathroom" I said, gathering the finest set of blank stares ever assembled as a result. It took amoment to register but it eventually dawned that she was referring to the Principal... I mean, if the Vice Principal is the VP it stands to reason, right?

But really... how fucking lazy do you want to get?

Incidentally, you may have noticed the location of my morning coffee, the Student Activity Centre (fancy name for the school canteen). They are having a major drive at the moment to get the kids to clear up after themselves, something I fully support but doubt will catch on as adults in this country are just as bad in food courts. What caught my attention, however, was the way in which they decided to get this across to the students... a nice big sign bearing the legend "KEEP YOUR SAC CLEAN".

...and no-one had a clue why I was stifling that snigger!

Cheers m'dears!

*That's: "Housing Development Board" (state built flats); "Pan-Island Expressway"; "Mass Rapid Transportation"; "Automated Teller Machine"; DBS I'm not sure of... but it's a bank!; "Post Office Services Bank"; "Hand Phone"; again, not sure of the actual words but it's a text message...; "Central Business District"; "Gin 'n' Tonic"; "Ministry of Sound"; "Sarong Party Girl" (essentially a loose young woman)

**This lot are: "Head of Department"; "Vice Principal"; "Music Technology"; "Integrated Programme"; "Student Activity Centre"; "Ridiculously Boring Colleagues"

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At Thursday, May 24, 2007 6:53:00 pm, Blogger Misssy M said...

That's good advice, though, on that sign.

Reminds of of a
Joke: Did you hear the one about the incompetent circumciser?

He got the sac(k)

from TART*

*True Admirer of the Random Tosser

At Thursday, May 24, 2007 8:30:00 pm, Blogger Misssy M said...

Or Tosser Admiring Random Trollop?

No, me neither

At Saturday, May 26, 2007 9:00:00 am, Blogger SafeTinspector said...

Mine smells of Lever 2000 bar soap, I presume. Not being in a position to properly verify this hypothesis, I'd have to rely on my wife's judgment. She, however, is more likely to kick than sniff the area in question. Of course I'm talking about my prize hackey sack, which I've played with since I was ten years old and is stored in a commemorative case under my wife's night stand.

Truly the acronyms are insanity upon you.

At Friday, June 08, 2007 12:45:00 pm, Blogger American Scot said...

Words to live by!
Where's the soap???


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