Random Drivel from your Average Tosser

...with your host, Binty McShae - whether you like it or not!

Friday, January 13, 2006

Dr Seuss... but even more warped!

Green Eggs and Ham? Pah! Yesterdays delicacy. What all the hip kids want now is Green Ham and Eggs, hence the newly spawned green pigs in Taiwan (yep, that place again). And we ain't talking 'green' as in 'good for the planet' and all that. We're talking fluor-fucking-escent green pigs snuffling around the sty and attracting moths at night!

This has all been taking place at the National Taiwan University where pig embryos were injected with fluorescent green protein by pissed-up undergrads with fuck all better to do. Or maybe that should read 'by researchers. With nothing better to do'. The results have caused great excitement with Professor Wu Shinn-chih from the Department of Playing God (or was that the dept. of Animal Science and Technology) rubbishing other 'partially-fluorescent' pigs elsewhere in the world. "Ours are the only ones in the world that are green from inside out!" he boasted. "Even their hearts and internal organs are green!"

If I ever get a rasher of radioactive bacon served up for brekkie it'll be my internal organs turning fucking green, I promise you.

On a final note... with all the complaints about expanding towns bringing light pollution to rural areas and nature-lovers not being able to see a decent starry night any more aren't glow-in-the-dark farmyard animals just exacerbating the problem?

Cheers m'dears!

12 Comments:

At Friday, January 13, 2006 8:04:00 pm, Blogger Cinnamon Doughnut said...

Why green of all fucking colours? They could've gotten well fucking creative with the piggie colour scheme - I'd personally go with glowstick oranges and yellows and whites for use as mascots for trance - and instead they choose the one colour where they'll lose them in grass. Fucking lazy morons.

 
At Saturday, January 14, 2006 1:06:00 am, Blogger justbreathe28 said...

hey, don't slag off the 'ol green cinammmmmmmon, i reckon twud com in very handy for paddys day, far more festive.think about it, green pints,green liffey, and green cows and sheep dotted on the landscape,ah just as Saint Paddy intended!!!

 
At Saturday, January 14, 2006 1:26:00 am, Blogger Cinnamon Doughnut said...

Hmm ... ok, but only if the livestock wear leprechaun-style hats complete with festive buckle.

 
At Saturday, January 14, 2006 6:24:00 am, Blogger Sarah said...

i'm so glad that they've discovered how to make pigs glow in the dark.. now that they've cured most of the worlds diseases..

 
At Saturday, January 14, 2006 2:08:00 pm, Blogger Binty McShae said...

.... as well as curing bacon?

 
At Saturday, January 14, 2006 8:54:00 pm, Blogger SafeTinspector said...

Wait, let me get this straight.
They injected an embryo with a flourescent protein and this resulted in the organism generating its own flourescent compounds from that point forward?

Seems a bit hard to believe, since I don't see any genetic manipulation being perpetrated upon the swine. What gland is being subverted to the task of flourescent compount production?

 
At Sunday, January 15, 2006 7:36:00 am, Blogger Dr Maroon said...

I heard this in the car. I still don't know WHY? They said they had used DNA from a jellyfish.

Oh Binty, i wonder if you would mind explaining my funny joke at lindyk's. It is comment 30 of 32 and is very good. Obviously I can't.

 
At Monday, January 16, 2006 1:13:00 am, Blogger El Barbudo said...

OK Binty - time to put some of this creativity of yours to some use. A new online comic strip – Blunt Cogs – is underway and could star you, if you want to create a cartoon version of yourself and/or fancy writing a strip or 2. Visit http://bluntcogs.blogspot.com/ for more details

 
At Monday, January 16, 2006 7:50:00 am, Blogger Binty McShae said...

Doc and El B, I'll check them both out...

SafeT - What? Eh? I ain't no scientist, y'know!

 
At Monday, January 16, 2006 4:30:00 pm, Blogger justin barker said...

Hows about a glowing Haggis?

 
At Monday, January 16, 2006 5:58:00 pm, Blogger Binty McShae said...

Wahey! What an idea...

Fluorescent honest, sonsie face,
Green chieftain o the puddin'-race!

Just need radioactive neeps n tatties to go along with it.

 
At Tuesday, January 17, 2006 9:02:00 am, Blogger Sarah said...

mmmm bacon...

 

Post a Comment

Links to this post:

Create a Link

<< Home